It can be deeply painful and confusing to know someone you care about is struggling with suicidal thoughts. While they may not always reach out, that doesn’t mean they don’t want help. Many people experiencing suicidal thoughts don’t want to die—they just want the pain to stop.
Suicide prevention begins with awareness, compassion, and the courage to ask difficult questions. Here’s how you can help someone who may be struggling.
Why Might Someone Consider Suicide?
Suicide is rarely the result of a single cause. More often, it’s a culmination of distressing circumstances or overwhelming feelings. Common triggers include:
Mental health conditions such as depression, schizophrenia, or personality disorders
Substance misuse – alcohol or drug dependence can heighten vulnerability
Isolation or lack of meaningful social connections
Chronic physical illness or disability causing pain or limitations
Traumatic life events, including abuse or a difficult childhood
Financial or work-related stress
Loss – such as the death of a loved one or the end of a relationship
Each person’s experience is unique, but what’s common is a feeling of hopelessness—of not seeing a way out.
What Might They Be Thinking?
People experiencing suicidal thoughts may feel:
“Things will never get better.”
“I’ve let everyone down.”
“There’s no way out of this.”
“Nobody would miss me.”
“I’m a burden.”
They might be unsure why they feel the way they do. Some may have a clear reason, while others simply feel numb, empty, or tired of carrying their emotional load.
It’s important to understand that suicidal ideation exists on a spectrum—many are conflicted, torn between wanting to live and wanting the pain to stop.
Recognizing the Warning Signs
You might notice subtle or significant changes in someone’s behavior, such as:
Withdrawing from others
Changes in sleep patterns
Increased irritability or emotional outbursts
Speaking negatively about themselves
Reckless behavior or self-harm
Talking or writing about death or suicide
Giving away possessions or saying goodbye
Sudden calmness after a long period of distress
Trust your instincts—if someone you care about doesn’t seem like themselves, it’s okay to check in.
How to Help Someone Who Is Suicidal
Start with a simple, open conversation. You can say:
“I’ve noticed you’ve been feeling really low lately. Do you want to talk about it?”
If you’re concerned about suicide, don’t shy away from the topic:
“Have you been thinking about ending your life?”
This might feel uncomfortable, but asking directly can actually provide relief and show the person they don’t have to hide their feelings.
When they open up, remember:
You don’t need to have all the answers. Just listen.
Avoid judgment, advice-giving, or trying to “fix” things.
Validate their feelings and let them know they are not alone.
Encourage them to seek professional support. Offer to help them find a therapist or helpline.
Stay with them if they are in immediate danger and contact emergency services if necessary.
What Not to Say
Even with the best intentions, some responses can do more harm than good:
“You have so much to live for.”
“Just think positive.”
“But your life is so good!”
“Don’t be silly, you’ll be fine.”
“Others have it worse.”
These dismissive responses can make someone feel misunderstood or invalidated. Instead, offer empathy, presence, and support.
When the Risk Is Immediate
If someone expresses a plan or intention to end their life soon, take it seriously. Stay with them and:
Remove any means of harm (medications, sharp objects, etc.)
Encourage them to call a helpline or accompany them to the hospital
Ask questions calmly: “Do you have a plan?” “Have you tried before?” “Are you planning to do it now?”
Keep them safe and avoid leaving them alone
In India, you can contact:
Vandrevala Foundation Helpline
📞 1860-266-2345 or 1800-233-3330
Self-Harm and Suicide: What’s the Link?
Self-harm is not always a suicide attempt. Often, it’s a way to cope with overwhelming emotions, to express pain, or to regain a sense of control.
If someone self-harms:
Don’t panic or react with anger
Try to understand their reasons without judgment
Encourage open conversation and safe coping methods
Help them access professional support if they’re willing
Don’t Forget to Take Care of Yourself
Supporting someone who is suicidal can be emotionally exhausting. It’s okay to seek support for yourself. You might:
Talk to a friend or therapist
Join a support group
Use emotional support helplines
Take time for rest and self-care
You cannot pour from an empty cup. Your well-being matters too.
Final Thoughts
Suicide is preventable, and your support can truly make a difference. Even if you don’t have the perfect words, showing up with compassion, patience, and non-judgment can help someone hold on a little longer—and maybe, find their way back to hope.
If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, don’t stay silent. Share this guide to help others feel less alone—and reach out for support when you need it. Together, we can make it easier to talk about suicide and support one another through dark times.
